October 2, 2019 74

Parent Teacher Conference | Lele Pons

Parent Teacher Conference | Lele Pons


Thank you so much for coming to the parent-teacher conference I gather to you guys here because of your kids. Oh they suck (Parents Protesting) They smell, they’re disgusting! Yes, they’re brats. Yes! Their kids might be but my daughter’s an angel. Yeah, Vivian? Vienna. Yeah, she’s, she’s what we call a teacher’s pet. What’s wrong with that? She’s good student everything. Okay. She’s a know-it-all Anyways, this is what happened. Good morning class. Good morning Mrs. Applebaum! You see that you see that you should behave good like Vivian. All right. Actually it’s how well I behave, and my name is pronounced Vienna. Okay, Veronica All right. So the Declaration of Independence was signed in 1975. Shhh! Actually, (Mumbles) (What the hell?) It was signed in 1776, in Pennsylvania by John Adams and John Hancock. (Claps) Okay, well sweetie alright; I’m the teacher and I’m gonna teach the class. Okay? If you were the teacher you would know how to do this. (Ooohhh) Vienna! Vienna! Vienna! Vienna! Vienna! Vienna! Vienna! Well it was 1776. You taught her everything that’s the problem you see. You over there! The phone. Yeah. Your kid. So the homework gets to each chapter five and six, okay? (Snores) Where is he? Who ever tells me gets a lollipop! Jake, get up and write the homework on the board. I’ll do it! I know— You know! Wake up. And then and then he fell asleep and everybody fell asleep, ma’am. Ma’am! Whose mother are you? Ja–Jake’s Mom. Ja–Jake’s mom? Oh, (yeah) now I understand What about my kid? Yeah your kids. What are your kid’s names? Candy, Kherry with a “K”? Oh. You guys. Yeah, that’s an interesting one. Samples are a type of retirement plan limited… Girl, back off. He’s MINE! No, he’s MINE! Hey– Teacher, there’s a problem. I–I see that. I asked him out first! Eh, eh eh Don’t talk to my friend like that! Shut Up! She saw him first! No! Sit down (Arguing) So yeah, they were fighting for ,uh, actually yo–your kid, your son. Oh sounds about right Tell my little boy. Well, I’m divorced Widowed. Uh-huh emotional baggage. Uhh (Fighting) Miguel! Miss Apple-but? (Scoffs) Did you throw that at me? Gladly. Oh really? Detention. Oh, one thing first! (Swooshing) Ya missed me. Did I? (Cheering) Wha-What is wrong with you people? Obviously your kids are like this because they’re influenced by your bad behavior. Are you serious? And your kid? Yeah and your kid; he deserves detention. (Chuckles) Got some for ya. What? (Swooshing) Oh, not too bad

74 Replies to “Parent Teacher Conference | Lele Pons”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

© Copyright 2019. Tehai. All rights reserved. .